Tag Archive: depression

No Inspiration

Sorry that I have not posted any photos that I have took myself here recently. Ever since before Christmas I have not really had any inspiration or drive to get out and do any photography. The Holidays were enough stress by itself, but I have come to find living where we are, well for lack of a better word is, depressing. Being that I suffer from depression myself, living here and trying to do what I can to protect my family and see that my kids had a good Christmas really took its toll on me. The area we live is has progressively gotten worse since we moved in in May of 2010. The violence has gotten worse and there are times I fear for my life just going outside to walk the dogs. Everyday I find it tough to start a project let alone finish one.

My hobbies have taken a back seat to everything. I have not picked up my camera and captured a photograph. I started drawing last year. One drawing was done and it was do big thing as I am a very new novice at drawing. I recieved a very nice art set for Christmas and I have yet to use it. And my long time favorite hobby, model railroading, has not even gotten past a piece of paper. I talk to different people who are into each one of my hobbies and I start up conversations and I do try to learn what I can. However I find it difficult to get past my depression and find the drive and motivation to do anything. I mean, I do things around the house, well what I can with reguards to my disability, but thats about it. I go out daily to walk the dogs within our apartment complex, and I have gone out and about a couple of times within the past couple of weeks, which does me some good. But its like what I get back inside, the darkness falls over me again and I loose what happiness and drive I did have.

I have come to find that the City of San Bernardino and the state of California is depressing. No one will ever be able to get me to change my mind. We are curretly looking for a place in Arizona where its slightly better when it comes to a few things, but at least its not here. Maybe after we move I will have more drive to do things. But until then I guess I am going to fight my way to find any motivation.


We all have been depressed at one time or another if we admit it to ourselves or not. Life has its up’s and down’s and at some point we break down and can no longer take it and we start to shut out those who love us and we start to hide from the world. Believe me I have been there more than once and at one time I was tempted to just end my pain and suffering. This was a few months after my father passed away in November 2004. I had my mother and 2 younger siblings, but no real support group for my depression and suicidal thoughts.

So first off I want to share with you a website that I think sums up 7 different ways to battle depression. Read each one and think about what you have just read and let it sink in for a moment. They make sence and are to the point.

7 Ways To Battle Depression

Next up I want to share with you the National Suicide Prevention website. If you or you know someone who are or are having suicidal thought, including those brave men and women who served in our armed forces, please, call the 800 number to seek out help. However if you are suicidal, don’t wait, call 911 and they can rush to your aid quickly and can get you help ASAP.

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is


National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

Even if one life is saved, then myself, you or someone else has succeded in the saving of someone else’s life. So please, take a look at the website as there is very good information on the site. If you are feeling depressed, reach out to a family member and your doctor for support as well as talking to a theapist for further treionatment and counciling.

    I am not connected to either website shared on this blog post nor am I a licensed doctor or mental or any other therapist and can not be held liable for any action, misinformation, medication or any other treatment. I am just offering simple advice and shall not be held civially or criminally liable if/or damage, harm or death should occur from taking said advice.